This was 14 years, 8 months ago

1. there's an immense joy in things sometimes. riding a bike fast on city streets at night next to a river. bright lights passing by. photographic/filmic bokeh rendered by the not-so-mechanical aperture of my pupil.

1.5. paint is wet.

2. I ollied for the first time, like actually rose and then landed flat on a stationary board. what, what, a thrill. thanks to the sir.

3. we went to see 'medicine for melancholy' the other day, there were maybe eight other people in the theater. do you lie at the intersection of 'indie/hipster' and, 'non-white' or 'thinking about race'? do you come to movies at the thursday night in the west village? the cumulative intersection of all of these meant that eight other people in a city of eight million were here.

4. I had a sincere conversation in the lobby of all places about race and class. it's nice to talk and discuss. there are constellations of activity that take place concerning interactions. there are minute observations that make so much sense. these things. there are tangents made at three am. etc etc etc etc etc

5. what am I doing? what am I doing? fucking art. high high low low up down fly crawl right left dexterious sinister etc etc etc. gated non-gated, bounded non-bounded. closure, outside, etc. spatial politics, disciplinal politics, examination of boundaries.

6. there's the dream of homogeneity, of translucence, permeability. I could be you and you could be me. exclusions are not here. motivated by not just equality but the possibility of equivalence.

7. and when you make art it's your aesthetics I subscribe to. obvious things, obvious things. once I see this it overwhelms and I can't see anything but this giant monstrosity in the room. how do you move beyond it? how do you, or you over there, or you in the corner? how do you act with the necessary self-critical action of denying your own beliefs to peer around the corners, the rims of your glasses to shake things up, to generate earthquakes that always rock your own foundations, to walk on slippery streets on purpose. upon this shakiness which instability itself is at stake, changing, unstable. how do you move beyond?