This was 10 years, 25 days ago

If you made a diagram of this accident, it would be something like a great mass of resources and desires aggregating around the world and congregating, millions of tendrils condensing into a single point, and then suddenly being scattered out into nothing. desire and history and form and legacy and materials and factories and workers and investors and drivers and media and everything whirling together into a vortex of complex interconnected relationships, then suddenly rendered meaningless.

can you imagine? all of this human effort wasted away because the object of desire wasn't the physical material mass of metal, wasn't information, or politics, or a series of networked relationships, or an emotional response, or a narrative -- but because the object of desire was an image generated by the physical form?

and so those red crushed ferraris are still physically there, the physical objects still present, no real chemical change having happened, really, it's not like sugar melting but more like sugar being spilled. spilled ferraris that are no longer ferraris, non-ferrari, non-ferraris.

but it doesn't matter; this is primal, the optical image, originating from the physical form: not the physical object itself but the specific arrangement, state, composition, formation, and temporality of that specific physical object itself;

Q: so lessons? lessons? what lessons? A: sometimes things are dashed away, sometimes they just disappear into the ether, sometimes a single gesture just changes everything and renders them massively non-itself, fundamental ontological shifts, sometimes it's a little bit more subtle then that, sometimes these changes ripple out from underneath gradually, like in a cycle, coming over and over again in waves that gradually decrease but still persist, eventually, until 'coping' isn't a destination to be desired because you imagine it to be this ideal state of 'no-longer-thinking-about', but because eventually the low slow waves that keep on coming become quiet enough, almost like background noise, blending constantly, so that one day you will stop and listen and realize that the thoughts you are thinking are there, just very faint; and one day in the future, years past, you will think back and remember and smile with utter sincerity and delight at that sincerely sincere person you were then, how the world ebbed and flowed because you were designing, positing positives, drawing lines to carve out the world.